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0:00
These are hiking boots.
0:00
These are actually from Pharrell's line called Human Race.
0:04
Me and Pharrell made a lot of music together for many, many years.
0:07
It was called The Nicktoons, and my music career, let's say, has stalled, but he makes a hell of a hiking boot.
0:13
Hi, GQ, it's me, Nick Kroll.
0:16
These are 10 essential items that I cannot live without on the road.
0:27
Good catch, Nick.
0:27
These are uh, Cape Cod Salt and Vinegar potato chips.
0:34
I always have some salt Vinnies ready to go wherever I am.
0:34
It's essential because you want that back of that, they're potato chips, but because there's vinegar, and this is scientific, because vinegar is like, it means that it kills all the fat, and that's science.
0:48
Usually my pre-show meal is like a massive bowl of uh, Bolognese.
0:51
It's like a salad bowl size of pasta, but if I don't have time, a bag of Salt and Vinnies, that'll do the trick.
0:59
Give me a little something, a little fuel to get through the show, and also you can't beat that crunch.
1:12
So this is GQ, you know it's for stylish folks, it's a lads mag, so I thought I'd show you probably the sexiest thing about me, and that's my toiletry bag, my dab kit.
1:21
I have a number of different antihistamines that I have with me at all times because I'm constantly having massive allergic reactions because I seem to be allergic to the world.
1:28
Fellas, you know what the ladies love is Savannah Cream, free of dyes, fragrance masking fragrance, lanolin, parabens, and from formaldehyde releasers.
1:37
Then let's get into the big boys folks.
1:40
Eucrisa is a non-steroidal cream that I put on my face.
1:46
I've always been allergic, but one of the cool things about getting older is that your body gets worse, the things that used to be slightly irritating, you become incredibly irritating to you.
1:56
There's one item that I always have with me when I'm on the road, and that is a spare tire.
2:03
It really is, it's an essential because you might get a flat tire, or you might find a bunch of babies who want to do CrossFit.
2:10
Can you imagine like a baby just like doing that over and over with a tire?
2:15
It's awesome, it's awesome to see babies taking care of their bodies.
2:20
I want to see babies do pull-ups.
2:23
I want to see babies push tires over and over.
2:25
I want to see babies do burpees, and I'm not talking about a cute word for burps, because babies do burpees.
2:34
No, I want to see babies jump up in the air, then get down, do a push-up, then stand back up and do another jump in the air.
2:45
So every comedian has some version of this, like you have your notebook that you jot notes in.
2:49
I always have one of these, I try to lose this like every four to five months, and then what I try to do, it's, it's in my rider.
2:56
I was trying to make sure to have at least three to four uh, broken pens to have with me to write down notes for things, jot down set lists, jot down new ideas.
3:17
These are always good to have a pen that has literally nothing inside of it, and I'll be like, this is disgusting.
3:17
I can't believe I'm using this pen to write down my notes, like how many hands have touched this pen?
3:17
And within like 10 minutes of being backstage in the green room, I'm like, hmm.
3:17
So this is the notes from my, from when I was working on my hour for Little Big Boy, now on Netflix.
3:17
It says your snacks and then it's this problematic eater and then an arrow and it says turn into income.
3:17
Whether that was a note for the set or a note for my life, it's worked out pretty well, and let's just say I don't have to ask for Salt and Vinnies in the green room, I can buy myself.
3:17
When I'm not getting jacked up on coffee all day long, I do like to have tea.
3:17
I really do drink a ton of Throat Coat when I'm on tour before a show.
3:17
It helps my voice, but also when I'm doing voice over animation, I drink literally pitchers of Throat Coat all day long because this voice and then going right into this and then we finish right back here, takes a toll on my throat.
4:15
So I like to get that Throat Coat, frankly, to coat that throat.
4:27
Just a PSA, if someone says, "I want to coat your throat," they probably don't mean Throat Coat tea.
4:25
You gotta have a tea kettle around, that's always on my rider.
4:29
It's weird, this one I guess belongs to some guy named Max, they let me use it, that's nice.
4:33
And this is matcha.
4:33
I love to hate matcha.
4:37
Who, what is everybody doing?
4:41
I know everybody loves matcha, it tastes like grass, and not that good kind, you know what I'm saying, both.
4:47
I can do this, it's legal, not interested in matcha.
4:53
So when you go on tour, you have a rider, what you don't realize is that the artists pay for their riders.
4:53
So forever I'd be like, "Yeah, let's get cold cuts, let's get buried, let's get it."
4:53
That's my big extravagance is cold cuts.
4:53
You order everything you could ever imagine, and then afterwards I realized like, oh, I was paying for those in every venue because I'd leave them behind.
5:09
One of the things that I would have asked for at every location was a yoga mat.
5:12
I want a yoga mat wherever I go so that I can stare at it and then not use it.
5:20
So I brought this one from home, you can tell it's being used.
5:23
Oh, look at that, that's crazy.
5:25
I guess an essential item for me is my Big Mouth yoga mat, you guys should get one at home too.
5:30
I do yoga, I really actually love it.
5:32
I mean, down dog, just for the pure sexual undertones to it.
5:38
Warrior Three, I also like, and that's when I get banged out by two dudes wearing Gladiator outfits.
5:43
What else? Mountain, that's where you're just sort of standing up straight, but I actually do, I always feel better when I do yoga.
5:55
Oftentimes when I can request a food like if in my green room or if I'm doing like a shoot for GQ Essentials, I'll say things that I want to have on the day, but really I just want to have so that I don't have to do grocery shopping later.
6:08
For example, I always have asked for organic eggs so that I can take those home.
6:19
Labneh is like sort of a yogurty spread, my son likes it with his oatmeal and his fruit and berries, uh, it's delicious.
6:21
These blueberries look like they were grown on a farm on Mars, they're massive.
6:26
I do like to say blueberries are nature's candy.
6:28
Mmm, unwashed.
6:31
This is a hmm, well, this is a multi-use item.
6:39
As I've gotten older, I have found the zucchini to be a very versatile vegetable, and you're the one who's being gross right now.
6:49
I do like uh, some ramen at home, uh, noodles in general.
7:09
Momofuku, Dave Chang's an old buddy of mine.
7:09
I get no money from this, but every now and again I get to go to his house and he'll cook me and my family lunch.
7:09
I do love uh, oh, a garlic chili crunch oil.
7:09
I really like to hike, especially in Los Angeles.
7:09
These are hiking boots.
7:09
These are actually from Pharrell's line called Human Race.
7:17
The problem with like hiking shoes in general is they're always like 4,000 terribly ugly colors.
7:24
What I like about these is they're just all black, they're very simple.
7:24
I would say Runyon Canyon where I think is probably the most known area to go hiking in LA.
7:24
I think a lot of influencers are there.
7:24
If you ever watch people hiking on Runyon Canyon, you can see a lot of people with real demons.
7:24
So there's obviously some stuff here that's like kind of a joke, but I have a couple things that are actually really important to me that I never leave home without.
7:47
I have this locket and it says always in my heart.
7:51
I have things that are really close to me here, um, one is a picture of me and the other is chocolate pretzels because I love chocolate pretzels.
8:16
I love how there's chocolate on the outside, and if I have to eat the ones with dark chocolate I will because I want to be healthy.
8:16
But then the inside is like crunchy and salty pretzels and I just when I'm away from home I want to remember how I can just polish off an entire huge bag of chocolate pretzels and not even remember that I've eaten it.
8:23
So I keep this locket right right here.
8:30
I keep it, I keep this like here.
8:30
I keep this is either a mini Theragun or my vibrating butt plug, and I don't remember which it is.
8:40
That feels pretty good.
8:40
Let me just just do a quick check.
8:45
This mini Theragun is really nice because it's a little quieter than the regular Theragun so you can be on the plane, you know what I mean, and just get to work.
8:49
I think we're all like pretty uh stressed out and my wife told me about fascia recently.
8:55
It's like the wrapping paper to the present that is our body.
8:59
We have to be better about loosening that wrapping paper and so we really got to keep our fascia loose and we got to burp and we need to burp, we have to burp.
9:10
Anyway, thank you so much for watching.
9:10
I hope you enjoyed a small glimpse into my weird, sad life on the road.